0 is NOT 0

Standing kinda-tall at 5’2,  I’ve never once hit over 100 lbs. And don’t get me wrong, I’m not here to brag. Because my weight has been an inner struggle I’ve never been vocal about. And believe it or not, I’ve been bullied.’

                 When I was 16, a bunch of girls decided it was OK pick up my arm during gym class and verbally state aloud, “If I were a boy in your body, I’d be so effin’ embarrassed to even  be alive. Look at how effin’ thin you are. Ew.” 

As far back as I can remember, I’ve felt humiliated every time someone would question, “do you even eat” or the dreaded “are you anorexic?” For that reason, I have never truly openly talked about my weight. If someone mentioned how thin I was or asked about my weight, I brushed it off with “average for my height!” Inside, I yearned to scream that my weight is my concern, not theirs.

Today as a professor looked at me and told the class,, “well 0 is not even a number” I sunk into my chair. I felt my 16-year-old self, embarrassed to say anything because I didn’t want anyone to know my weight.

Honestly, I don’t believe I’m the perfect size nor do I believe in that #thinspiration bull crap. I enjoy eating, no I love eating. Have you checked my Yelp page? It’s just a pity that in this day and age, we’re still here talking about a woman’s weight and size.

Whatever, I’m going to go eat a Big Mac.

#0isnot0 #youarebeautiful #iambeautiful

 

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